the infinite // short poem

And I used to run my hand through
The stars like the night was my 
Canvas
And infinity was my paint brush 
And we were everything
And 

Nothing. 

But there was something beautiful in our existence...
In our nothingness,
As we realised that a tiny dot 
A sparkle
Of a distant star was so much more than we could ever be 
And we took a picture
And I hung it on my wall
To remember 
That even an infinity can end. 

I've decided I will try and write a poem a week and post it on here. They never take very long- this one was quite literally a stream of conciousness spanning a whole 30 seconds! Writing keeps me grounded yet allows me to fly...

Life is pretty hectic at the moment: school, job and just living. I feel pretty tired all the time and am verging on an existential crisis.... Music and Tumblr help :)

I will try and take a few outfit photos soon!

Keep existing,
J

*photo from tumblr*

the social media thing// the ramblings

I recently addressed this on Instagram (ironic I know) and wanted to elaborate on here. Okay so, social media is not real. This is arguably the most important THING about it: it is not real. Anything anyone posts online, whether that be youtube, tumblr, instagram, twitter is not real. Because you are viewing it through a screen. You are capturing a moment and then compressing it in to a gif or jpeg or a mp4 file or whatever and that is NOT REAL.

Now, I love Instagram. I have over 6,000 people that follow my feed; that is 6,000+ people that have never meet me in the flesh. Sure,they've met Jessie, oceanpainter_.... but they have NEVER met Jessie. And that's dangerous. I can portray whatever the heck I want to these 6,000+ people and they would never know the truth. And I, like anyone on any social media ever, am guilty of that.

Recently, I have been imagining  becoming instagram famous or youtube famous. Basically becoming an internet phenomenon. Then I watched this video [x]. And then I found her website [x] and honestly, I have never been so inspired in my life. Her video scared me. It made me want to take everything I had of myself down from the internet.

But.

What if I was REAL? Okay, so nothing I ever post is going to be an absolute representation of what is going on in my life, but that doesn't mean that I cannot be free. Freedom is a powerful THING, let's prevent social media from compressing us. I believe that everyone has the ability to CHANGE something in the world-an opportunity- and maybe my opportunity is through instagram, or my blog? I have a freedom, a power to change something. And I don't want to abuse that power.

I'm not perfect. And I never will be. I don't ever post the bad stuff. The parts where I'm crying or feel unmotivated or depressed. Sometimes I feel ugly and unlovable. I'M HUMAN.

Everything I write and post is as real as one can be on social media. Or at least, I try. I never edit myself or change my appearance to please number. I would never objectify myself (although it is very tempting to sometimes want to). I  just want to be me, And to be free.

I want to write to make people think. I want to take pictures to inspire. I want to post a video to make people laugh. It is all too easy to fall in to the trap of social media- and I don't want to anymore. So heck, I'm going to post whatever I want because WHY SHOULD WE BE DEFINED BY A SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORM?

So as my new inspiration so rightly says, "Let's be game changers!"

-J